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Monday, April 02, 2012
A.L.O.N.E

i think i was kinda stressed out recently. Coincidentally, when i was blogging on this post, an advertisement was sent to me ( 8 tips on managing stress lol). good timing.

I know my attitude problem relapsed again. im sorry to my mum & bf. When things is getting out of control, i just want to be alone. i do not want to speak up. whoever talks to me when im in a foul mood, im sorry u get the shit. i just dun wish to explain why am i feeling like tis. Because u may think im crazy, or i would get tat kind of respond like 'this kinda thing also stressed up? Or, tell me la, we will solve this together'. Just lemme be alone, dun ask questions. Eventually i will tell u when im feeling better.

Sometimes i think its better for me to be single. So that no one will get the shit from me. i have TOOOOO MANY things in my head. i have been complaining, have been picking on u, have been wondering, am i ready for it? I have alot of things i always wanted to do, but i cant. i dont have the ability to do it.

i think i need some time alone, i need to do some self-reflection. i have the urge to travel to other country alone. i want to find my real self, what i really want. i always trying to be nice, which sometimes i would think, what for? do they appreciate? why be nice because i want to appear nice to others? am i really nice by nature or acting to be nice? i don't know. suddenly i felt empty, doesn't know the direction of life.

This isn't a sucidal post. i just wanted to say how i feel. It's gonna be another day for me, without knowing what i really want.......................